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About Moiself

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Just a simple person whose been married for the past 2 years. Loves to be with her love ones. Haiz I am still in my 1st job u know heheheh berapa nya taat kan aku ? Padahal orang taknak kot hehe.Hmmmmmm my bloggie is exclusively for the view of my close ones and fellow bloggers bukan nak suruh sesapa pi discuss whateva thingy ku type in here tau. Whateva I type in here are all my feelings and thoughts for the day. Tidak ada kena mengena dengan yang hidup ataupun yang mati. Amin hehe

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Monday, May 30, 2005

27/05/05 was usually the happiest time every month as its payday. But not for this time round. I rather say its a very bad date to remember. Why ? Cos my nenek left me and the entire family for the rest of our remaining lives. Nenek ku telah kembali ke rahmatullah pada hari ini. I felt so hopeless cos I did not manage to at least talk to her on the phone or see her leaving me. Was at work the whole day. My Becimo does not get connected and donno for what reason also ? Maybe ni semua tanda that I should not be happy ???Busy with the open house thingy. At neary 6pm, I went down and did the closing up for the open house. Clean up the ice cream tubs etc. Waited for the reps to pass to me the leads thingy and than sat down and chatted with Dorine Goh... While we were on the way up to office, I received a call from Cik ALip, my febrit uncle. He sounded shaky"Hello Noi, Nenek tak bangun2. Kita kejut dia tapi tak bangun". I was like what ??? Hmmmm than gather my courage and say "Cik Alip pi kol ambulance". Uncle ask me for the number and we hung up. I was badly shaken and went to get buddy. Shes was in SP's room with JT so i kept quiet. Than I went in again and told her. Shes shocked too. Sapa yg tak terperanjat. Buddy told me to quickly pack up and leave. I sat down clearing some things and HL called. He asked me why i sounded so sad. Told him what happen and he volunteered to send me there. Hmmmm than the call was cut .. His battery was flat and hence I donno where to meet him n what time. I told buddy I am preparing for the worse that is nenek is gone. She told me to sabar. HL smsed me and told me hes at the lobby. While in the car, i called again and Cik ALip told me, "Noi nenek da takder, officer ambulans da check". N dats it my final straw. I really wanna breakdown but I cant. HL consoled me and volunteered to send me upstairs to my uncle's place which i nicely declined as many things got to be done and I will not have time to chat up with him. Saw an ambulance downstairs...... I know its for nenek... Saw the pull out stretcher at 9th floor. Its all prepared for nenek. Went inside Pak Busu's place and saw nenek on the bed.I donno how to explain that i had that time. Wanna cry but than gotta be brave and also theres many people ard. I touched nenek's cheeks and shes so warm. Like how she used to be when shes ard. I cannot believe my eyes. Nenek look so peaceful and Alhamdulillah she was really lying menghadap ke arah kiblat. I broke down and cried.... My dear nenek. The one whom I looked up to. The one dat I used to follow to work sometimes during weekends or shool holidays when I was in Pri school. Yesh she was a strong lady and she insist on working until finally we told her dats it she must rest. I just saw her last week when she came over to accompany mama while I went for my Bangkok trip. Me, hubby and nenek had a long chat abt old times..Abt arwah abah, arwah atuk, our family and many more... Little did i realized that will be the last time I saw her alive. When she went home last Wed nite her last werds to me "Noi telefon telefon nenek eh". I say ok.... I usually call nenek whenever I am free. But this tiime round when I really wanted to call her, she has left me before I managed to call her. Hmmmmm her last words was a sign but I never get to realize it. Nenek ampunkan Noi......

I clean nenek up and did the necessary. Waited for the rest to come. Meanwhile I had my shower and read Yasin for nenek. Melihat nenek ku tak bergerak di depan mataku sesungguhnya menyedihkan. Finally, all begin to arrive. Maknga was crying ...Hmm got no say la... Just tell her to cool off....I was really depress but I know crying wont solve any matter. Doa kita yg nenek perlukan... SO i gotta be strong..... Mum n hubby arrived soon after. Kita semua bacakan nenek yasin at at 10plus I broke down in front of hubby outside the house. Hmmmm Mebbe becos of the close bond that I had since i was young with nenek,I felt the most impact abt pemergiannya.

Think I gtg... Will continue when I am stronger cos as I am typing this, tears are rolling down my cheeks.

Moga roh nenek ditempatkan di golongan mereka yg dikasihi Allah. Al-Fateha buat nenek ku : Rukiah Bte Basok. Amin

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